As I've spent time in Russia, I've been mentally compiling a list of things that I had been told before coming here. For example: Never go walking somewhere without a map, because it can end with embarrassing anecdotes such as walking to Baltiisky Vokzal when you wanted to walk to Nevsky Prospect.
... Okay, so, to be fair, someone might have mentioned that numerous times throughout my childhood (a.k.a. my family), but it looked like such a straight shot...
Anyhow, I figured that tonight was as good of a night as any to finally put some of those lessons learned down on paper, so that no one* need be surprised by these Russian realities once they arrive.
*"No one", as in, "no one who has read this particular post on my blog, or else who has already been to Russia at least once and thus already knows". But simply putting "no one" is much more impressive looking, far less wordy, and allows me to add a disclaimer to my own blog, something I have not had the privilege of doing until just now.
1) Someone told me that they have peanut butter in Russia. THIS IS A LIE. A PAINFUL, TERRIBLE LIE. (It may not be obvious, but I happen to be somewhat of a peanut butter fan... meaning that when in the States, I eat some medium to large quantity of peanut butter every day, without fail.) If you happen to enjoy peanut butter, including things with peanut butter in them (let's say, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups), bring it with you. What you will encounter is a soul-crushing lack of peanut butter. Apparently, according to legend, it does exist in select locations; however, I have yet to find one such magical source of peanut butter, and even then, those who have beheld such a marveled location said that the peanut butter was extremely expensive. What Somebody should've told me: bring your own massive jar to stave off peanut butter withdrawals.
2) Someone told me that they have everything that you have in the US. (If you can't already tell, my faith in Someone is shattered.) This is not entirely true. I've already recounted numerous times my trials with bandaids; but even beyond that, such immune boosters common in the US (such as Emergen-C or Airborn) are not available in Russia. True, there are similar things in Russia-- for example, fizzy vitamin C tablets, or fizzing multivitamins. But if you're a fan of brand, what Somebody should've told you is to once again bring it from home.
3) Baking is not a universal thing. I had never really pondered baking before; the farthest I would think about such things is what I would like to make, or else what would be tasty. But here in Russia, I've discovered the strangest thing about baking: the ingredients to bake, save flour, yeast, and baking soda, are very difficult to come by. What do I mean by this? Russian sugar is much coarser, and much thicker than its counterpart in the US (for example). I have yet to find chocolate chips (last time, when Princess and I introduced the family she lived with at the time to American style brownies, we had to take chocolate bars, break them up, and put them in the microwave), when we needed vanilla, we had to use vanilla sugar (we couldn't find vanilla extract at the grocery store), and we ended up having to make a double batch because common American baking pans are surprisingly rare in Russia. What Somebody should tell you: if you can't live without baking, shove as much baking supplies as you can manage into your bag.
4) This does not just relate to baking, but general aspects of life. Russians, it seems, are entirely lacking in certain ingredients. For example, when I have brought up both celery and cinnamon, I have received blank stares from the respective Russian citizen I spoke with. While the celery is a relief (I'm allergic to raw celery, after all) and the cinnamon is a disappointment (apple pie without cinnamon!), the point is, you can't expect everywhere in the world to have everything. What Somebody will tell you is, if it means so much to you, either look long and hard for it or bring it with you. Or, depending on your means, have someone who loves you enough to send it to you in a care package.
5) Something that always caught me by surprise when I moved here is the fact that all the Russian households I've either visited or lived in did not have trash cans. This is not to say that people didn't throw things away; they would just have very, very tiny approximations of trash cans, or else grocery bags sitting on a chair in the kitchen. Somebody would tell you just to expect it; it's not a hard thing to get used to, just a surprising one.
Anyhow, Somebody is exhausted from his long day of battling someone, so I think I'll wrap up this post and go on to doing other non-productive things.
 |
| ... Yeah, not entirely sure how that happened, either. |
Anyhow, I figured that tonight was as good of a night as any to finally put some of those lessons learned down on paper, so that no one* need be surprised by these Russian realities once they arrive.
*"No one", as in, "no one who has read this particular post on my blog, or else who has already been to Russia at least once and thus already knows". But simply putting "no one" is much more impressive looking, far less wordy, and allows me to add a disclaimer to my own blog, something I have not had the privilege of doing until just now.
1) Someone told me that they have peanut butter in Russia. THIS IS A LIE. A PAINFUL, TERRIBLE LIE. (It may not be obvious, but I happen to be somewhat of a peanut butter fan... meaning that when in the States, I eat some medium to large quantity of peanut butter every day, without fail.) If you happen to enjoy peanut butter, including things with peanut butter in them (let's say, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups), bring it with you. What you will encounter is a soul-crushing lack of peanut butter. Apparently, according to legend, it does exist in select locations; however, I have yet to find one such magical source of peanut butter, and even then, those who have beheld such a marveled location said that the peanut butter was extremely expensive. What Somebody should've told me: bring your own massive jar to stave off peanut butter withdrawals.
2) Someone told me that they have everything that you have in the US. (If you can't already tell, my faith in Someone is shattered.) This is not entirely true. I've already recounted numerous times my trials with bandaids; but even beyond that, such immune boosters common in the US (such as Emergen-C or Airborn) are not available in Russia. True, there are similar things in Russia-- for example, fizzy vitamin C tablets, or fizzing multivitamins. But if you're a fan of brand, what Somebody should've told you is to once again bring it from home.
3) Baking is not a universal thing. I had never really pondered baking before; the farthest I would think about such things is what I would like to make, or else what would be tasty. But here in Russia, I've discovered the strangest thing about baking: the ingredients to bake, save flour, yeast, and baking soda, are very difficult to come by. What do I mean by this? Russian sugar is much coarser, and much thicker than its counterpart in the US (for example). I have yet to find chocolate chips (last time, when Princess and I introduced the family she lived with at the time to American style brownies, we had to take chocolate bars, break them up, and put them in the microwave), when we needed vanilla, we had to use vanilla sugar (we couldn't find vanilla extract at the grocery store), and we ended up having to make a double batch because common American baking pans are surprisingly rare in Russia. What Somebody should tell you: if you can't live without baking, shove as much baking supplies as you can manage into your bag.
4) This does not just relate to baking, but general aspects of life. Russians, it seems, are entirely lacking in certain ingredients. For example, when I have brought up both celery and cinnamon, I have received blank stares from the respective Russian citizen I spoke with. While the celery is a relief (I'm allergic to raw celery, after all) and the cinnamon is a disappointment (apple pie without cinnamon!), the point is, you can't expect everywhere in the world to have everything. What Somebody will tell you is, if it means so much to you, either look long and hard for it or bring it with you. Or, depending on your means, have someone who loves you enough to send it to you in a care package.
5) Something that always caught me by surprise when I moved here is the fact that all the Russian households I've either visited or lived in did not have trash cans. This is not to say that people didn't throw things away; they would just have very, very tiny approximations of trash cans, or else grocery bags sitting on a chair in the kitchen. Somebody would tell you just to expect it; it's not a hard thing to get used to, just a surprising one.
Anyhow, Somebody is exhausted from his long day of battling someone, so I think I'll wrap up this post and go on to doing other non-productive things.
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